One of my husband Tony’s most endearing qualities is his timely sense of humor. He always has a fun comment or crazy joke up his sleeve, which inevitably makes me laugh so hard that I cry. When we were first courting and starting to get to know each other we found out we had many things in common. We both grew up in Catholic homes and discovered the most important thing we have in common is our Catholic faith.
Our faith has continued to bring us closer together as our married life unfolds. As we grew to know each other better we realized how important it was for us to share our faith, growing closer to God and, in turn, growing closer to each other.
Growing in the faith requires believing in God and maintaining a close relationship with him. You can have this relationship with God through daily prayer, Bible study and applying what God says in the Scriptures in your personal life. Committing to daily growth and learning of our faith is perhaps a challenging thing to do in today’s fast-paced world, yet it is possible if you make it a priority for living a fulfilling, sacramental married life together.
In order to grow in the faith as a couple we each need to love God more than each other. In this way we are reminded that our ultimate goal as spouses and in marriage is to get each other to heaven.
This past March my beloved Tony and I celebrated our 30th wedding anniversary. Over dinner that night we could both say that, in spite of many challenges that have come our way, we wouldn’t change the outcome of our shared 30 years. That’s because God has used our relationship with each other, more than anything else, to make us more like Christ. And ultimately — that is his purpose for marriage.
How do we make time to grow in faith?
First, make a plan — write it down — and help each other to be accountable. Ask your spouse for honesty, support and encouragement in specific areas in which you want to grow in your faith, whether it’s completing an online adult faith formation class or committing 5 minutes each day to prayer. You may be at different levels in your understanding of the faith. Take note of this and be ready to light up the fire within each other from time to time.
Have quiet time together. Take a few minutes, maybe starting at least once a week and working up to once each day, for quiet time as you pray silently side-by-side in each other’s presence.
Read and study the Bible. Each month choose a Bible passage and take a week to meditate on it. Then share with one another what you’ve discovered and how your understanding grows throughout the month.
Worship together. Set a date each month to worship together outside of Mass. Worship God through praise, adoration and singing (at a park, on the beach or at home).
Serve together. Tony and I served as wedding coordinators at our parish for several years. Meeting with the many young couples who were preparing to embark on this lifetime journey reminded us of the time we were starting off in our own marriage. You, too, can periodically choose one area of ministry at your local church or a charitable organization to serve God side by side.